Gen Z Cancels the Sun: Climate Activists Demand It “Turn Itself Down” by 20%

In a move that has both scientists and boomers scratching their heads, a coalition of Gen Z climate activists has launched a campaign demanding the Sun reduce its intensity by 20% “to combat global warming and unfair tan lines.” The group, calling themselves “Solar Justice Warriors” claims the Sun is overstepping its boundaries and has been totally out of line since the Industrial Revolution.